OK, so Halloween’s on the way, people have been going on and on about Trick ‘r Treat, and finally we had the opportunity to sit down with it yesterday for a proper Halloween movie double-header.
Let me get this out of the way right up front: I don’t get it.
I mean I kind of get it, going for that whole “We haven’t had a decent dumb Halloween-centric flick since Halloween III: Season of the Witch” vibe. But no, I don’t get it.
I really wanted to like this one, if for no other reason than the oddly iconic “Sam,” the burlap-cheeked mascot of the flick. And hell, Brian Cox! Need I say more? Well, yes, apparently.
For those who haven’t caught this “must see,” Trick ‘r Treat has your typical EC Comics/Creepshow setup: a handful of creepy stories tied together by a larger wraparound tale. Some mean kids try to freak out a socially awkward little girl, the school principal gets creepy, the town recluse gets harassed… you’ve seen it all before. It’s slickly produced, the sound is great, it features your usual plastic-perfect stars…and the thing just doesn’t go anywhere.
“Hey you kids! Get off my lawn, and stay the hell out of my gardening tools!”
A couple nights back, Lady Pain and I settled down with Tom Shankland’s 2008 English infant apocalypse The Children(not to be confused with the 1980s flick of the same name), and got ourselves a creepy, effective little nailbiter for our troubles.
There’ve been plenty of “bad seed” and devil-baby movies in the past, but this one’s not what you’re used to. A handful of ostensibly normal wee ones begin to use the skills they often employ to manipulate adults in daily life to deadly effect, tormenting their parents in a way far more distressing than anything you’re likely to see in a typical slasher.
It’s not that the methods of dispatch are particularly upsetting, but the assured way that they play on adults’ feelings for them is what makes this one so effective. The commentary on “enlightened” parenting (we don’t hit children here), though a tad heavy handed, is also a perfect example of the way the New Horror uses violence and arresting imagery to address larger real world issues. The camera work and its use of nature shots in the dead of winter are particularly effective here.
Sure, Shankland explains the children’s violent streaks away with some mysterious illness that’s infecting the tykes, but this is the only cop out of the movie, and probably instrumental in keeping this production safe from the censor’s ax. It no doubt also helped dampen the protest against the scenes where the adults start fighting back against their deadly offspring. The long buildup to the final showdown may limit The Children’s rewatchability, but this one’s definitely worth your time.
The movie is Airplane. The titular aircraft is experiencing a bad day and somebody’s sitting in their seat, losing their shit, while nuns, boxers and a great many more are lined up to slap some sense into her.
We are that line of disciplinarians, and Hollywood is the squealling passenger. And Paranormal Activityis the slap heard round the world.
Don’t think so? Think again. Paranormal Activity cost $15,000 to make, cost Paramount about $2 million to acquire, and so far has made more than $9 million on an extremely limited release. It’s set to open across the country very soon.
Thwack!
Addendum: After an amazing, viral PR push, Paranormal Activity is now opening across the country on 10/16/09. Click here to find a theater near you.
Paranormal Activity, the Little Horror Movie That Could, continues its subtle domination of the world, one theater at a time. After a few weeks of enticing horror fans to “Demand” screenings of the flick in their neck of the woods, word now comes that if 1 million people do so, Paramount will open the movie wide across the country. What that actually means is open to interpretation right now, but still, an extremely clever gambit this.
This year being the 10th anniversary of the release of The Blair Witch Project, the temptation to compare the two films is overwhelming, especially considering the expert use of viral marketing. However, there’s more to it than that.
When you look at the ebb and flow of horror movies in the last 15 years (feel free to do so by picking up a copy of The New Horror Handbook), Paranormal Activity has more in common with Blair Witch than a great marketing campaign. Both movies hit theaters at a time when theatrical horror releases had descended into flaccid, formulaic tripe.
In 1999, the competition was The Mummy, Stigmata, Sleepy Hollow, and a few other equally predictable works. This year, it’s H2, Final Destination 4, Jennifer’s Body and Saw 6. With the exception of Diablo Cody’s entry, it’s all been there/done that.
Will we still be talking about Paranormal Activity 10 years from now? I’m guessing that we will. It’s not often that you get a genuinely scary movie in cinemas. Hopefully we will all get the chance to see this one amidst the shrieks and jumps of other horror fans.
Addendum: After an amazing, viral PR push, Paranormal Activity is now opening across the country on 10/16/09. Click here to find a theater near you.
God bless the slow news days that summer brings. Don’t get me wrong. I wrote my fair share of “local man builds tallest matchstick sculpture” stories, too, back in my newspaper days.
But the “controversy” (3 people, 4 people?) surrounding the recent thriller Orphan puts me in mind of the good old days when at least one movie each year would drum up enough self-righteous indignation to make for a good media spectacle. That was, of course, before society collapsed. Gone are our simple pleasures…
And this is what it’s come to? A few people who have far too much energy with the issue believe that Orphan could potentially give Orphans (sorry, orphans) a hard time? May I simply suggest to whatever incensed masses (both of you) bristle at the thought of this movie either a) see it, or b) do a Google image search on the word “orphan.” After that second option, we can then talk about how horrible movies are.
And after all the kerfluffle, why can’t I help but think that a marketing manager for said film suddenly had a hankering for the old days of movie protests, too?
You'll excuse me if I SHOUT, as my treacherous brain seems to have soaked up the song featured in the above trailer for Darren Lynn Bousman's Repo! The Genetic Opera, and is now trying to deafen me with it.
My own fault, really. The moment I spied Sarah Brightman in the credits, I should've kept well clear. It was her vocalizations with Michael Crawford in the original cast recording of The Phantom of the Opera that sidelined me for a good three years back in my early 20s. Come to think of it, Tony Head's singing in the Buffy the Vampire Slayer musical episode "Once More With Feeling" had a similar effect, and who do we find co-starring in this extravaganza? Once shame on them...
While we horror fans do get the odd glimmer of something new and different bubbling up from the ooze of the everyday (Inside being one of the best and most recent examples of this), I can't remember the last time I saw a trailer for something that actually made me feel like I was catching a glimpse of something completely unique.
There have been a lot of shiver-inducing backstage rumblings about film distributors having no idea how to market this rock opera about a designer body part company sending its "repo man" (Head) out to snatch back these parts from those who miss their payments. On behalf of every soul out here desperately wanting to see this work, let me say to the suits: "Please don't fumble this one! We have put up with far too much crap for far too long to miss out on a truly original work."
Sigh. Now where's that Phantom album...
[Note: Repo is having its North American debut at the Fantasia Film Festival in Montreal July 18th.]
A big shout out to Ted and Tony at the Horror Etc. podcast. Their most recent episode about Man vs. Nature movies (from Day of the Animals to The Ruins) led me to hunt down the trailer for this year's remake of Long Weekend (see clip above). In this case, it's Man vs. Manatee.
There is no shortage of controversy in our beloved genre. The absurd numbers of remakes that spill out of Hollywood, the validity (or lack thereof) of torture in horror films, the copious amounts of utter dreck that the average fan must sift through before finding that rarest of the rare: a great horror flick.
One of the oddest controversies revolves around the man fans love to hate: Uwe Boll.
True, the director's cinematic output is less-than-stellar: BloodRayne, Alone in the Dark (yes, yes, the one where Tara Reid played a scientist, sigh...), House of the Dead, you all know the roll call of shame. What puzzles me is the utter vehemence with which fans have attacked the man.
We're all friends here, and surely we can all admit that a good 95% of the movies this genre churns out is utter bilge, to put it mildly.
Let's try a little thought experiment, shall we? Picture in your mind an empty 6x8-foot DVD rack in your local video shop. See it? Good. Now start filling that rack with each horror film that you've actually enjoyed, one DVD box at a time -- sure, even those guilty pleasures you would never admit to watching. Chances are pretty good that you would never fill that rack. That means all of the dozens of horror films that DIDN'T make the imaginary rack are crap, and much of it probably crap no better than Boll's works.
So why then do we not curse the name of these other directors, too? Yes, Boll's a repeat offender, but his horror output is surprisingly small - I count seven movies - considering the amount of animosity that's shoveled into his schnitzel.
The Scotsman published an interesting piece on this phenomenon recently, pointing out the difference between how people view Boll and the affection showered on the previous holder of the "world's worst director" crown: Ed Wood. Though no explanation is given in the piece, one is clearly implied. Whereas Wood was something of a sweet stooge, Boll often comes across as an angry, bellicose sort. If nothing else, he may go down in history as the first director to meet his critics in the boxing ring. (Something he tried to repeat earlier this year [see clip above] with director Michael Bay.)
While this kind of behavior is far removed from the gentle, starry-eyed dreamer depicted in the 1994 biopic Ed Wood, there may be another reason why Boll is so universally reviled. Between his lashing out at the critics and his grumbling about being unappreciated, he occasionally turns the mirror back on the movie-going public. Take this open letter he posted on the Web site of his latest film, Postal:
To all of you writing now about me and the fact that POSTAL is not getting screens.
its okay ..its fun kicking a guy nonstop who is on the ground
you are all not getting it that i'm the guy who made it against the big hollywood system and you are all only busy to destroy me and finish me up
and then you YOU WON WHAT ? the attention of the studios, michael bay .. ?????
if you damage me you feel closer to Hollywood ? what is your game plan?
you want only movies like JUMPER , SPEED RACER , WHAT HAPPENDS IN VEGAS ...? then keep going and your dreams will be fullfilled. POSTAL makes some very important points ..but you dont wanna see that .... : that Bush used the SEPTEMBER 11 to start a war against a country what had nothing to do with Bin Laden etc.... but this all doesnt matter because you are all busy to THINK that INDIANA JONES or NARNIA are important movies ... but in real they are empty shells of an industry what wants to make money and what wants to keep you looking "escape movies" with nothing in it. in between they are putting some CONTROVERSIAL movies to show that they can do also IMPORTANT movies ...but also this movies are not really critical....they only supporting the system and not showing the big picture. and POSTAL shows the BIG PICTURE ...it nails the absurd situation with all the stupid religions, races and nations we are living in. POSTAL is not accepting bullshit politics. POSTAL has not the opinion that Bush made mistakes - POSTAL has the opinion that it is a scandal that BUSH is not in jail. What happened in America in the last 7 years is the biggest joke since Columbus stepped on that land.
but instead of seeing the courage i had in doing that movie against everybody who tried to stop me - you are sitting on your desks and you are working on stories about me ....and my image as the worst director on earth...and you fullfill what your editor wants from you in regards of uwe boll ...or you fullfill what you think makes you a cooler guy in the internet ...and you are not getting it that you are only interested in movies like IRON MAN or HULK or KUNG FU PANDA or the MUMMY 3 because the studios spending 60 mio. $ in advertising to make you interested in NON INTERESTING movies. how many times you wanna keep going in movies only because the TRAILER was so cool and the CGI was so great ?
thanks for reading this
Uwe Boll
Many crimes are unforgivable, but none so much as letting fly with a bit of truth.
The folks at Rue Morgue magazine are trying to prevent the long-awaited adaptation of Clive Barker’s Books of Blood short story “Midnight Meat Train” from being given a perfunctory theatrical release before being rushed to DVD.
It's a Red Letter Day, kids. After months of reading articles, interviews, and seeing clips galore, your's truly finally sat down with the French thriller Inside (A l'interieur) last night, and it did not disappoint.
I'm keeping this entry short for fear of spoiling a film that's too new to the English-speaking world to have its twists and turns prematurely revealed. Suffice it to say that those numerous YouTube clips adequately get across the brutality of the film, but fail to communicate the depth of the overall production. Had the acting been anything below top-notch or the attention to script and aesthetics been at all lacking, this could've very easily spiraled into a standard slasher film. Thankfully, that is not the case. The talents of the directing/writing team of Julien Maury and Alexandre Bustillo, combined with exemplary performances from leads Beatrice Dalle and Alysson Paradis, make this one of those films that horror fans will either see now, or will pretend they have already seen later as they wait for a copy to arrive from Netflix.
Paranormal Activity, the Little Horror Movie That Could, continues its subtle domination of the world, one theater at a time. After a few weeks of enticing horror fans to 
God bless the slow news days that summer brings. Don’t get me wrong. I wrote my fair share of “local man builds tallest matchstick sculpture” stories, too, back in my newspaper days.